What I Didn't Do

When I ask my husband how I lost 100 lbs., he says, "Mind over Matter, Baby. Mind over Matter."

When I ask my kids, they say, "You stopped eating as much and you danced."

That, my friends, is really all there is to it. I know that sounds simple. But...it's true.

You, I know, are wanting pointers, steps, ideas, answers.

So I will oblige.

First I will tell you what I did NOT do:

I did not join a club, hire a trainer, or attend even ONE fitness class.

I did not watch a single work-out DVD

I did not attend a group meeting, calculate points, or buy meals in a cardboard box.

I did not count calories

I did not measure food

I did not keep a food journal

I did not look at a clock, or time a workout

I did not invest any money (really) in the process of losing weight

I did not give up my favorite foods

or cut out sugar (or carbs, or meat, or dairy)

or obsess over fat grams (I was aware of fat grams...as I'll detail later)

If you are doing any of these things....GREAT!

More power to you! They will make a huge difference in your success.

They will certainly (probably), impact the SPEED of your success.

Go for it! Keep it up! You are doing MORE than I did!

I needed to do this alone.

The way I see it, I gained the weight, alone (with no one's help)

and I HAD to lose the weight, alone.

I needed to make permanent changes in ME.

I knew, I would not be able to maintain, at home, something someone got me to do in a class. I knew I could not follow a diet, because the moment I quit the diet--I'd be back to my old ways. I knew I could not give ANYTHING up completely--because I have a memory like an elephant--and elephant-sized taste buds to match. To give up something I LOVED, would mean the memory of what I gave up, would live as a Phantom in my gut...beckoning me, wooing me to return again--and consume enormous heaps of whatever I had sacrificed. (I'm talking about Bacon, here people. And Lay's potato chips, and McDonald's fries, and grape slushes and peanut butter cups and burgers, and.....the list goes on!)

I know myself, and knew I'd have a great time drawing a chart, creating menus on my computer, setting goals and pledging to work out 45 minutes a day, 5 days a week....and then...I'd lose steam in about 3 days. I'd swear off sweets and vow to drink 6 glasses of water a day, and buy new sneakers, and a new arm band for my iPod. And I'd still lose steam in 3 days. I knew I'd get all excited about getting up early in the morning to start my day, and then (by the third day) hit my snooze three times, or pray for a rainy morning, when I was heading to bed. And then I knew I'd feel guilty. And like a bad person. And a worthless woman, because I couldn't do it. I'd be even more upset with myself than I had been four days before, when I'd gotten on the scale and seen the latest, Mt. Everest-sized numbers staring back at me.

I also knew I couldn't be on a rigid schedule or plan. I couldn't JOURNAL my foods, because I'd fudge. I mean LIE, about what I ate...even though no one would ever see the journal but me! My life is busy with four kids. Places to go and people to see. Meetings to attend? I KNEW I'd be a failure before I even started, if getting to the place I wanted to be weight-wise, meant adding any commitments or obligations, to what I already had going on in my life!

So (drumroll)...

Here is what I did:

I stopped eating.

Did you get that?

I. Stopped. Eating.

and

I started feeding myself.

Again,

I. Started. Feeding. Myself.

And that is what I am going to teach you how to do.

HOW TO FEED YOURSELF

Next time.

(I kind of feel like Ryan Seacrest saying, After the break....)

For now, here is what I ask you to do:

SOME TIME, VERY SOON....(like, in the next three days)

1) Buy a spiral notebook (THIS IS NOT A FOOD JOURNAL). Get one that is fun, or funky. With something on the cover that makes you laugh or smile, or captures you now, or who you were when you were young.

2) Find a pen you really like the feel of, in your hands.

3) Get yourself one of those big ol' CONTAINERS of minty gum (the kind that fit in the cup holder of your car).

4) Pick up a new lipstick, or lip gloss or lip balm.

Then, find FIVE minutes to sit down somewhere...

5) Pour yourself a glass of ice cold water.

6) Pop a piece of gum in your mouth and chew it. Taste it. Feel the candy shell crunch with your teeth. Get it really soft, work on it for a minute. Pucker your lips and suck in some air. Feel how cool your mouth gets. Take a sip of that water. A nice gulp. It's almost too cold to handle isn't it? Notice how it freezes the gum? Makes it all tough and hard? Crazy stuff.

7) Now, put on the lip stick/balm.

8) Open up your spiral notebook to the SECOND page and describe what you JUST did. Make a list of 10 words, detailing the sensations, experience, feeling, thoughts you have about that gum, the water and your mouth. REALLY DO THIS. DON'T JUST READ THIS.....DO IT! Write a paragraph if you want. Fill up that sheet of paper, focusing on the gum. Draw a picture if you want. Fill up that page, as best as you can. We'll talk about why you're doing this...next time.

9) Go back to the FIRST page in your spiral and print (in the center of the page):

STOP EATING

START FEEDING MYSELF

10) Chew a piece of gum, whenever you want, as often as you want for the next several days, but take the time to experience it, like you did in #6 (but without the water).

That's all.

Be your best,

Becky