A Team Effort

Today
right now
this minute...

I could eat a dozen donuts
and
go back
for a Whopper
and Mickey D's large fry
(and a Route 44 Grape Slush from Sonic)

and I am not hungry
not even close
I am just
terribly bored

There is work to be done
things I could/should take care of,
but, here I sit
typing
thinking
putting words on the screen,
to keep my fingers busy
to occupy my mind
to figure out, what exactly
is under my skin right now...
inching me closer to the kitchen
pulling me to the pantry
egging me on to the frig.

It is not hunger
It is not stress
It is not emotional need
I know, I know, I know
It is boredom.

Boredom with myself
with my surroundings
I am feeling unchallenged
Un-productive (but not wanting to actually produce anything).

Fresh air
Company
Sunshine
These would all do me well.
These would all feed me.
But I would rather have something salty
and crunchy
and potato-y
and meaty
and ketchup-y
and peanut-butter-y

Here is what I will do.
I have been in this position before.
I have been in this position for years,
and in the past,
I would venture into the kitchen and begin grazing.
searching
seeking
and eating anything and everything I found along the way
That is what I used to do
(and sometimes, still do),
But
this time,
I am enlisting the help of my support team...

My children.
I need them, right now.

They need me ALL the time, and I am there for them,
so now, I am calling them in as reinforcements,
and getting help from them...
I know one will take a sunset walk with me
I know another will cuddle with me on the couch
I know another will throw a football around with me in the backyard
I know another will make mac & cheese for her sisters and brother for dinner
and make up a plate for me with hummus and chips and a little of my favorite chicken salad.
They will serve me dinner, and get me a Diet Coke to enjoy on the front porch.
I will ask them to take care of me this afternoon
and they will gladly oblige.
I have taught them how to do this.
I have taught them TO do this.

They will help me through the boredom.
They will be my team.
We work together on days like this.
I am vulnerable with them, about my struggles
and my decisions
and my weaknesses
and my boredom
They want to see my succeed.
They know how far I have come.
They have been there through it all.
They are my support system, even though they are 12, 10 and 8 (x2)


And then,
at the right time,
I will tuck them in
and thank them
really thank them,
for caring for me so much
for looking out for me
for helping me get through the day
for being on my team.


Do you know who you need?
Look around.
Who is there to help you?
Who is there to be on your team?
Not to hold you accountable
(you have to hold your SELF accountable, if you really want success),
but to hold your hand
walk a few blocks
have a conversation
enjoy the sunset
sit a spell
or spend some time
just
being?

Who is there to tell you
(after you've told yourself a few times),
that's it's ok to relax
and not always DO something
not always Make Something Happen
not always Go! Go! Go!
These are the folks to spend time with.

Assignment:
Use your journal to make a list, assemble a team of sorts, of people who love you.
ANYONE who loves you
and likes you
and wants to see you succeed.
These are the people YOU need as your "go-to" folks.
These are not people who will make you feel guilty or judge you or demand from you. These are not people who you will disappointment with your realness or struggles. These are the people who genuinely think you're great, just the way you are, and would like to be able to spend more time with you than they already get to. These are the people YOU are going to start spending more time with--because you need them. YOU need people. You need your family. You need your friends and neighbors. YOU need them to help you be a better YOU.

1) Make your list of team-mates

2) Write a specific activity or thing you can do or share with or for EACH specific person...it may be emailing, texting, talking, walking, listening, WHATEVER...it may be cuddling, playing, coloring, manicuring, reading, WHATEVER...Make the name list, and the "what I can share with them" list.

3) Each time THIS week, you feel about to EAT, when you are not really hungry, think through that list, reach out and FEED yourself THAT person. FEED yourself (as odd as that sounds), that person and what you two can share.

4) Follow up with a note to them. FEED them your thanks. Your encouragement. Your genuine heart. Let them know what they mean to you. FEED them with words. A note filled with actual words. You have no idea how this will impact them. No idea.


As for me, as soon as I'm done here,
I'm calling my kids in from outside where they've been playing.
I am going to invite my daughter and two of her friends to go for a walk.
I am going to tell my son to get the football ready, 'cause we're gonna play for a bit when I get home.
I'm getting out the mac and cheese, and turning over dinner responsibilities tonight.
I'm making sure the porch is ready for me, when I'm ready for it.

I am dealing with my boredom
Challenging myself, and my children,
to turn this evening into something significant
something different than what it was a few minutes ago when I started typing.

And I feel better already.

That's all.
Be You Best,
Becky